Birth Order and Personality

I've always been very interested in people: what they do, why they do it, why they *think* they do it, etc. I've looked into many reasons behind personality and how it develops and the biggest contributor seems to be birth order. I've researched many variations and theories behind birth order over the last ten years, but the theories I've found to be most viable are the ones put forth from Dr. Cliff Isaacson's book, The Birth Order Effect.

This is the only book I've ever found that refers to a Fourth Born personality. As a fourth born child, I was very interested and became even more so as it described me to a 'T', unlike any other personality book ever had, birth order and otherwise.

A little background about me- I'm the fourth born of four kids (boy, girl, boy, girl), and both of my parents are fourth borns, which makes me a sort of super fourth born. My siblings follow the birth order personalities found in 'The Birth Order Effect' as well.

I have taken what I've learned by being a fourth born and use it in my work as well as my day-to-day life. A fourth born has to learn quickly how to deal with different personalities and types of people in order to get along with their siblings. The knowledge I gained in doing that made me interested in other people. This soon translated into wanting to help people as well, and I have always done best at jobs that involved interaction with and assisting other of people. My current job is speaking with various individuals and organizations and re-working web-based technology so that it makes their jobs easier. It requires listening to their needs and then translating some of the things they vaguely talk about into something more physical, that they can see and touch. It's an exercise in problem solving from both the technology and human sides and I love both sides of the process.

I find as a fourth born that I have trouble opening up to people. Fourth borns are so often forgotten and left out by family and friends, that letting more people into your life just allows that to happen more frequently. As a result, I've become much more selective in my friends. Once I am close to them, I mention that being left out of things is what I dislike the most. Knowing that, and my not having that many pet peeves other than that, they work hard to remember to invite me to almost everything even if they think it's something I won't be interested in. And since knowing that they want me along is what I want the most, this keeps me feeling secure and happy.

I think knowing your weaknesses, no matter what they are or what your personality type, and working to deal with them is one of the most important things to living a fulfilling life. Also, the people closest to you knowing and understanding those weaknesses helps them avoid them or disarm them before they cause either of you grief.

I've always been the peacemaker in our family, calling injured parties after a fight and helping them see what the other was feeling or trying to get across. Being a fourth born has been vital in being able to do that since I'm the only one in our family that understands everyone else. Even though I'm younger than my brothers and sister by nine, eight and six years, they still come to me when family issues arise.

Being a fourth born is a blessing and a challenge and every time I meet another fourth born, I want to talk with them about the issues they face and how they deal with them. I think talking with other people that truly identify and understand how I am would be both helpful and satisfying.